Jump to Navigation

DeathDoll Entry 3

Doll's picture
Submission type:

“Dead men working a sinner a saint
Mixing up a pail of paint
Painted the house, black as night
When the sun came up the house was white

Doll sang quietly stretching her legs out and tugging down her short skirt, her fingers ran through the dead mans dark hair, she didn’t know how long she had been there but the bodythat lay against her legs had become rigid, the once warm blood was cold and sticky against her legs, soon the body would bloat and possibly rupture as it began the stages of decomposition.

 “This is fucked up,” she said growing impatient  and standing  up knocking the body away to lay in a heap on the kitchen floor.

 She decided she would find them, she stood up grabbing the twin pistols off the dressers and made her way to the front door whistling to Contengan, the large dog ran to her blood glistening off his muzzle.

“Theres my good boy” she smiled patting the dog,“were going on a little adventure today” she smiled down at the dog.

 The last few years she had somewhat settled down in New flagstaff, killing only for pleasure , she lived a modest life of depravity, but the travelers she was meant to meet with were late, something had to be up, and she wasn’t going to wait around any longer. 


Aiidoneus's picture

The opening gave a very mysterious tone to the whole entry. 


Paragraph structure was very good as well.  Glad to see your still a gifted writer. 


Doll's picture

Thank-you :) 

Lock all the doors and kill the lights no one's coming home tonight

Ya, I like it....I gotta work on making my writing look better like this. Travelers, always in trouble....causing trouble


Doll's picture

:) I'm glad you liked it, I'm going to try to keep improving, I do like your title "Ya I like it..I gotta work" lol 

Lock all the doors and kill the lights no one's coming home tonight

I was lazy, if you dont put a subject it just auto puts the first few words int here for you.....


Engel's picture

*is a fan.

- this comment was brought to you by Oilville Primo™ -

Main menu 2

Blog | by Dr. Radut